Panic Woke Me Up This Morning…By
This morning, even before I was awake I could feel panic swelling in my chest. Right now, if I focus on it, even for a minute I can feel it surging in my arms, making my fingers shake.
As I woke up I wondered where it was coming from. I often feel some low-level of worry or guilt, but outright panic is very rare… and to come on even before I was conscious and having thoughts I feel could create it, seems even odder.
There is a concept I’ve come across in various places about being able to pick up on other people thoughts. Tuning into and experiencing a ‘common consciousness’ if you will. I know we all do it… like when you enter a room you can feel the energy of it, when someone’s mood changes over the phone, you can feel it shift, even though you can’t see them.
So, I asked myself if the panic was mine – the answer – no. Maybe a tiny bit, as I definitely have my worries about things, money in particular – it doesn’t seem to matter how much is flowing in my life, there is often a lurking concern over there being enough, more coming in etc.
This panic was definitely about money, but my circumstances haven’t changed much in the last 24 hours – actually, if anything, they seem better. So, what the heck is going on?
Well, I just had a chat with a dear friend, Patty Lennon, and she reminded me that I had a similar panic experience at this same time last year… and she waited to see if I could figure out what it was about. I was clueless.
Finally, she said, “It’s tax day.” Oh, yes. Of course.
People are freaking out about getting their taxes done, paying, if they haven’t, getting ticked off about how much they’ve paid and how little their getting back. All around me people are freaking out about money. If that is the overall ‘collective’ experience, then it seems a likely explanation for why I feel it too, even though I can’t identify a specific reason in my own life.
No wonder panic was rippling through me even before my eyes opened! Now, I know, and next year, when tax day hits, a reminder will pop up in my calendar letting me know that if I experience something similar, it’s not mine and I can choose to let it go.
And, it may help you to notice that when you are suddenly struck with emotion or feeling, and you can’t quite figure out where it is coming from, you may be having a similar experience. Ask yourself if it’s yours, if it’s not, you can choose to release it and let it go.